Since the start of 2019, my husband and I decided to have a weekly rhythm of remembering and observing the Sabbath for our family. Until then, there was no rhythm of rest in our weekly rhythm – holidays, sickness and vacation were our times of rest. Yeah. Can you say “burnout”?
Our family is pretty active – we like to be involved in ways of serving, homeschool, kid activities, family and friend time, but also love our simple days at home. But year after year, we were finding our souls getting more and more tired and worn down. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually.
And then this verse, translated in The Message came to our eyes and ears, and then into our hearts.
And we are so thankful to have heard some great teachings from Bridgetown Church in Portland, Oregon and later on from Jefferson and Alyssa Bethke and Jeremy and April Pryor on the why, what, how of Sabbath.
So, we decided to start the first week of January 2019. We picked Saturday night, lit 2 Sabbath candles, made a nice dinner and a pizzookie (giant pizza cookie… if you haven’t had one…) for dessert. We wanted our kids to love Sabbath, too. We taught them what Sabbath (Shabbat) means – “to STOP!” One time we asked “Stop WHAT, kids?” And one kid said, “Stop sinning!” Ahem. Out of the mouths of babes! And so, we try each week to reiterate each what exactly we’re stopping.
Stop what? You may ask. Stop striving. Stop working. Stop producing. Stop spending and doing. It’s time to stop to rest, refresh, recenter, and trust God that the world will continue to on without our involvement. (Cue humility)
We heard it said that it may take a couple of years to really find what works for your family, and each individual in the family. And we’ve seen this to be true. I feel like the past 6 months have been our best Sabbaths yet. Quarantine life focused a bit more, as we were burning out more quickly. My husband and I were so thankful to be at the first Family Teams Conference in Cincinnati this past October, where they discuss observing the Sabbath in detail, and that really helped us with more ideas and refining our vision for practicing Sabbath.
We now Sabbath from Friday night until Saturday evening, instead of Saturday night through Sunday afternoon. My husband is the worship pastor at our church, so Sunday wasn’t particularly restful for him. So, we decided to try it starting Friday night, and it’s been working very well! We have a special scent candle that we only light on the Sabbath, and my husband requested that I light it before he gets home so he smells in upon walking in the house. It definitely signals REST to us. We are entering into rest. We still light the candles, read a Psalm or short passage of the Bible (we have lots of little kids, so little spurts of Scripture have been best at this season of our family’s life) and we found an upbeat song we sing each start of Sabbath, called “Shabbat Shalom”. It’s very catchy and we love it!
We feast, watch a movie, play games or something fun as a family, then go to bed. In the morning, we stay in our pajamas if wanted, eat a leisurely breakfast, and hang out at home. Sometimes, we’re at home reading books, playing outside, or maybe it’s a non-stressful outing together. Then nap/quiet time for an hour (parents, this is a game-changer!) Please know that every now and then we have a Sabbath that just didn’t fill us like we were hoping. Things come up, life happens. Just keep going!
*update on this post on 8/29/2020: since quarantine life hit the world back in March, we decided to try out something we heard, and this routine has stuck with us most Sabbaths since. We decided to split our Sabbath into 3rds. One third would be my time to have free time while my husband was having time with our kids, and then we switched and he had his free time and I was with the kids, then the last third is family time. It has been so life-giving to do Sabbath this way! That’s the thing, try something – you never know! Keep going and you’ll find something that works for that season of your life.
We believe that Sabbath should feel like a mini Christmas each week! Feasting on great food, being with family (and friends), resting, not working, being present to God and to each other. It is not legalistic. It is a GIFT. Jesus is the Lord of the Sabbath (Matthew 12:8).